Marcus's Butterfly

Three years ago my nephew, Marcus John Russell, was laid to rest following his brave battle against brain cancer.  Jessica was recovering from surgery on her leg and had an open wound... I couldn't leave her so we held our own memorial here at our house.  Just as we were getting ready to start our memorial a butterfly got into the house and flew to the light over our table in our family room.  It fluttered around the light and then fell onto the table. 

 It opened it's wings and allowed us to get a good look at it.  Jessica was a little nervous but we were all impressed that a butterfly flew into our house after dark!  We've never had a butterfly come into our house and aren't they supposed to sleep at night?

I grabbed my camera and took pictures. Karl took the envelope with it's little passenger outside and the butterfly flew away. We had our memorial and Jessica said, "Marcus sent us that butterfly, huh Mommy?" She kept telling me that Marcus sent it. 

Karl with Austin and Brandon

During our memorial some of us wrote notes to Marcus and then we went outside. Karl built a fire and we put the messages in it so the flames could symbolically take the messages to Marcus in heaven.

Jessica and Austin

We discussed many things that we loved about Marcus and how we would miss him.  We also talked about heaven and how there is no pain there and that Marcus can see and walk again.  We also talked about who was there with Marcus.

 Austin comforting Jessica and Dad coming to help 

 flames symbolically taking our love and messages to Marcus

Jessica and Austin

As we were getting ready to go back inside another butterfly came and fluttered around the light on our back patio. I already had my camera so I flashed some quick pictures. At first we thought it was the same butterfly as before but looking at the photos I can see that it's a different one. It could even be an orange moth but the first one was definitely a butterfly.

Almost two years later, as Jess lay on her death bed she promised to send me butterflies from heaven like Marcus did... and she has!

I love and miss my girl and my nephew, Marcus Russell. He did so much to comfort Jessica and help her move from this life to the next. I'll be eternally grateful to him. ♥

Families Can Be Together Forever

I learned this song as a child and have always loved it. It helps me to remember that I will see my sweet Jessica again and that we can live together forever. I haven't posted since her passing - 5 months ago today.  I just haven't felt emotionally up to posting here but I have posted a lot on facebook. I like that I can post just a few sentences a day on fb and be done.  I'll try to post more here because I like that I can label my posts and easily look them up later.  The past few days I've been looking over my "Jessica" posts to find the fun events in her life.  She had so much pain and suffering that she endured... those are the thoughts that tend to flood my mind... so I am looking for the joyful moments and the smile on her sweet face.  These are the moments that I NEED to remember.  She will NEVER have to endure pain again!  I'm so very proud of her. 

Our family has been going through a lot as my youngest son is having a lot of medical problems. We are seeking treatments with several doctors, therapists and our bishop. He has received several priesthood blessings and I know that he will be healed. Better days are ahead. We just have to keep hoping, praying and working towards that goal.  We also won't always hurt this much at the thought of her being in heaven.  It's hard - oh, so hard - to think of how long it will be until we see her again - but this journey will be worth it! 

New blog design, Jessica's birthday & Updates

I was getting tired of the same-ol thing and wanted something to cheer me up so I changed the background on both this blog and my craft blog. I find it to be quite cheery.

So here's a quick update on us:

Karl is still working hard, Justen and Ravyn are still blissfully married and have stars in their eyes, Brandon is finishing up his junior year and did a tremendous job as "Felix Unger" in "The Odd Couple". He sure has a talent! I hope to add photos of this play soon. I even got a few short clips! Austin is about to graduate or "promote" as they are calling it now from middle school to High School. I can't believe my youngest child will be in HIGH SCHOOL!!! When, oh when did they grow up? I still remember when I had one in preschool, one in elementary, one in middle school and one in high school! Boy, that was quite a year having them all in different schools and going and coming at all different times. Now I only have two left in school. Anyway, we are looking forward to a productive summer. Austin and Brandon plan on working on scouting projects and other fun things.

Jessica will be 22 years old on June 3rd! I can't hardly believe it. We are planning a party on June 4th (Friday) so if you are in the area and want to come, email me at fancydancycrafts @ cox . net (no spaces). Or if you'd like to send her a card, email me. *smile*

Unfortunately Jessica is still having a lot of pain. The new medication seems to be helping some and I think that her belly is definitely softer, but she is still in pain. She has been eating less the past few days and she looks bluer. She told me that she felt palpitations (she opens and closes her hand really big to explain what it feels like) so I put her on the pulse-ox and her heart rate looked good but her oxygen sats only went up to 67% at rest. (Her goal is 77% - 78% and normal is: 96% - 100%) That is also on 3 lts of oxygen... she always has it on and we always measure her sats with it on. The oxygen can help bring her sats up by 5% - 10% so it's worth it to keep it on... but it can only do so much.

I've had a few dreams lately, one was yesterday while Jessica and I were sleeping, and I dreamed that Jessica had died. I hurt with my whole being. I wanted to desperately to hold her, kiss her and see her smiling face. As I was waking up my body was hurting from my fibromyalgia so I didn't want to wake up but my heart was hurting so badly that I didn't want to stay asleep. I know that I'll feel that anguish one day and I won't be able to go into her room, wake her up and hold her. I hate having to go through this grieving before she is even gone. And I hate seeing such a beautiful young lady (aka: baby girl) suffering so much pain every day. Sometimes I just want to scream: "My baby is dying!!! She's in pain and I want that pain to end! But I don't want her to go!" I was crying a little as I was waking up thinking, "I'm not ready for her to die.... I'm just not ready!" But when will I be ready? I lie and tell her that I will be fine and for her to go ahead and go to heaven when it's her time. I put on a brave face and hold her as she tells me that she wishes that she was already in heaven with Marcus (her cousin who died 1 1/2 years ago) and Donna (our next-door neighbor who died last Nov) because that way she won't be in pain any more. She tells me that she wants me to make a game room out of her room so that her brothers can go in there and play games, watch tv and remember her. What's odd is that she has always been so protective of her room that she would never let her brothers even step foot in it without yelling at them! But the last year or so if she has been watching something on her tv and one of her brothers has stepped in to ask her something and gotten interested in her tv, she has invited them to sit down and watch it with her. I think that's pretty cool. She knows and yet she doesn't. She seems to get reality and fantasy mixed up more and more. She asks complicated questions and doesn't understand the answers and she repeats things multiple times not realizing that she's told me 3 times already. Oxygen deprivation is a terrible thing.

Oh, did I forget to update what is going on with me? Well, let's see. I've made a few cards (my creative therapy) and have managed to clutter up my whole craft room! LOL I've reconnected with some ooold friends on facebook. One good friend from college and one from high school. It's like we've picked up just where we left off. Actually, my friend from college called me. It was great to hear her voice again! It's been about 10 years since I last saw her and 12 years since I saw her kids. My friend from high school... let's see, it's been ... since I first started college since I last saw him. I don't think I'm going to put how many years that's been. HAHA! But it was great to tell him about my family and to find out about his. Boy, life is sure different than what we had in mind way back then.... but ya know what? It's still good. I grieve and care for a dying "child" but she brings me so many blessings that I can't even count them all. My husband is the absolute BESTEST and my sons are quite amazing. I see them growing and changing. I've had quite a few great talks with them one-on-one or even together. I love it that they feel then can trust me. Brandon wrote something so sweet on my fb page. I sure love that kid! I posted that I was going through a mid-life/identity crisis. He told me how much he appreciated me being his mom and that he can't even imagine not having me as his mom. He actually posted that on my fb wall for all the world to see. Not too many 16 yr old boys will do that. :-) My other sons tell me they appreciate me and that they love me too. I also have a daughter-in-law who tells me that she loves me and what a neat thing that is! I'm also trying to organize my house. I just need a back-ho and a huge garbage bin out front. LOL I want to make my house a haven. I also need it to be presentable for guests in 2 weeks! *gasp!* Thankfully Karl will have a few days off right before the party so he can help do the yard work and get our gazebo lights and fountain working again. (and take care of weeds, etc, etc) I just wish my body didn't hurt so much, could sleep when I'm actually in bed and that my allergies hadn't kicked in and caused my sinus problems. It would help me with all those goals. ;-)

Please continue to keep Jessica in your prayers. We want her to have a great birthday! She has told me several times, "What if I have a bad tummy ache on my birthday?" and "I want to be able to eat some of my birthday cake at my party... what if my tummy hurts too bad?" Of course we always think that this could be her last birthday, but if things continue going down-hill like they are.... I'd really hate to see how bad she would be a year from now. So all good thoughts and prayers are welcomed. Thank you for visiting!

A good day

We finally had a really good day today! Jessica was finally feeling up to going to our local support group, Tu Nidito. They were having a picnic and we had hamburgers & hot dogs grilled by chef Randy! (one of our awesome volunteers who's wife takes Jess and I to lunch every so often). We visited with another family who have 3 girls, one of which is battling leukemia for the 2ND time. :*( They are so cool tho and Jess had fun sitting with them and talking with them. Austin even came! It's been several years since either Brandon or Austin went with Jess and I so it was a real treat for him to come. Everyone made him feel so welcome that he thinks he will try coming back in September after our Summer break. ; They have made some huge changes at the Tu Nidito house (it used to be a home and then was turned into offices and then used for our support group. They received a grant and another awesome building with 4 classrooms and an office in the back, a lot more parking (including handicapped) and a new playground with REAL GRASS! And not that sparse grass where you see a blade or two every once in a while, but real thick grass. Most of you are probably laughing at my obsession with grass but not if you've lived in Southern AZ. Water is expensive and the sun burns grass up. So most people don't have lawns and the public parks usually have the 1/2 dead grass. My CHD friends think I'm nuts when I've gone to KS and CT to visit them and "oooo" and "ahhh" over how green everything is. {that was back in 2001 and 2003 - I used to have somewhat of a life. :-P}

OK, back to Tu Nidito... behind the house is a patio area which has been also been refurbished. It has a small grassy area and nice waterfall with a small pond. I never had a chance to go to the back to see it all during the construction since Jess insists on NOT taking her wheelchair and she can't walk all the way back there. Little did I know that they had opened up the back wall so we could see from the patio a lot of what had been done.

I took a couple of pictures... unfortunately I didn't get the landscaping before it got dark. I'll have to post some later since it's almost 5 am and I need to get some sleep if I'm going to take Jess to her appointment (and I dare not miss this one!)

Thank you for the many uplifting comments and emails I've received here and on facebook lately. My mom called me after reading my last post and my sister has been very worried about me and Jess... yes, things are quite tough around here a lot and I really need the support, but there are still many reasons to smile and many reasons to laugh - and I believe there are still many more to come.

Thanks for stopping by!

I almost forgot....

to update you about the horrible flu we had. It wasn't the SWINE flu .... althought my kids do act like little piggies at times!

Jessica, Austin and Karl are all feeling MUCH better. Karl is still coughing some but at least is able to sleep and work. Austin has been back to school for about a week and is catching up on his school work. Justen is coughing a little here and there but I think it's mostly allergies at this point... in fact, I wouldn't be surprised is Karl's cough is allergy related too. Jessica is still on prednisone but I'm going to call her pulmonary doctor today and see about weaning her off of it. It is making her puffy, ornery and she REALLY can't sleep at night. Fortunately Brandon and I didn't get the cough. My voice was raspy and my sinuses are still giving me some trouble (not extreme) but I think it's allergy related too. I have these same problems every fall and every spring. Lucky me!

I am so thankful everyone in my home that was sick is getting better. I'm exhausted from taking care of everyone while they were sick. I think I need a vacation. My older brother and his family are going to Hawaii later this month. I wonder if I can fit into a VERY LARGE suitcase and go with them? haha!

Thank you for checking in on us and I'm sorry I didn't update sooner. It's been a rough few weeks.

((hugs)) to you all!

Thanksgiving

I've been such a bag blogger lately! I'm so sorry! Life has a way of taking over and unfortunatley I don't always get to blog as much as I would like.

We had a wonderful thanksgiving! Justen and Ravyn both had to work in the evening/night and weren't able to make it. :*( Karl had to work too but was home early enough that we were still able to get together with family afterwards and have a good time.

Here are a few pictures:
The MEN

Chuy, Grumpy Gramps, Stoobie, Karl and John


The GIRLS:
Marissa, Natalie (in back), Julie and Jessica in front


Karl teasing the girls
Marissa, Jessica and Julie (my sister Alice in back)


The silly girls
Marissa, Julie, Jessica and Natalie
Notice Brandon being silly in the background between Julie and Jessica's heads. LOL! My brother John and Karl in the background to the right.


Yay! Brandon finally got to be in a picture with his sister. Silly Marissa kept popping her head up every time we tried getting a picture with Jess and Brandon.


The BOYS:
Austin, "little" Stuart being held by Brandon, and Jesse. Baby Hyrum was alseep and didn't make it into this picture. We got plenty of pictures of him later.


Jesse playing his violin.


My youngest brother, Stuart, and his wife Clarissa (who is expecting a baby in the Spring! yay!)


My youngest sister, Alice, and her husband Chuy


My "middle" brother, John, and his wife Mandy. They came from CA to spend Thanksgiving with us. They also announced that they are putting in paperwork to adopt a baby. YAY! We are so excited for them. :)


And here's Me with my sweetheart, Karl. I'm the oldest girl and 2nd to the oldest of my siblings. Ignore the silver streak in my hair... I'm going for the Pepe Le Pew look. LOL!


Here is Alice's baby, Hyrum. He is 4 months old and couldn't be cuter!



Hyrum is such a happy baby but he doesn't like to smile for the camera. It took a lot of skill for me to get these two of him smiling. hehe! Don't you just want to smile looking at him?


Here is Mandy with Hyrum. We figured she needs some practice for when she gets a baby through the adoption agency. :D Hyrum was so intent on grabbing the red cups so he was given a clean cup to play with. He kept grabbing at it and it would go flying so his dad put the cup on top of his hand. He was also going after his red teether. He was the life of the party.


We all had such a great time at Alice's house and the food was very tasty. Jessica really had a great time playing Barbies with her girl cousins. Of course she got very worn out and is still trying to catch up on rest (me too!), but it was well worth it.

Oh goodness, I just realized that I didn't post any pictures of my mom! My mom was the only one who remembered her camera so of course she took most of the picures. (I took the ones of Hyrum). I'll have to look through my pictures and see if I can find any of her.

My Life.... busy as usual

Oh My Word! I can't believe it's been more than a month since I updated this poor neglected blog! Soooooo much has happened... but then again, it is my life! LOL

Let's see.... what has happened:

Jessica: Had a birthday, turned 20 years old!!!!!!!! I can't believe it! The big bad CHD (congenital heart defects) that tried to take Jess multiple times while she was an infant, and again as a child, as a teenager we almost lost her ... but she has made it to "adulthood!" Something Karl and I never dared dream would happen. Of course she is still at the level of a 7 yr old but she has lived for 20 years and that's a huge accomplishment! I'll post pictures soon... I promise! Jessica's wisdom teeth are trying to come in so I'm going to have to get her in to see her dentist. He said that he will take a look but who knows if he can do anything about it.

Justen: Justen and Ravyn have decided to post-pone their wedding until December. After taking a look over living expenses, etc, they realized that Miss Ravyn needs to have a job and help financially before the wedding. It's a huge reality check, isn't it? I think that one of the hardest part of growing up is having to provide for yourself and your family. Karl and I struggled financially for quite a few years and still have to watch what we buy. It's rough going sometimes but I'm sure that Justen and Ravyn will do well once they get everything in order. We are still so happy that Ravyn is going to be a part of our family. At least it won't be so hot in December! The wedding pictures will be less likely to have sweaty, melting wedding party in them. They wedding cake won't have to be served in glasses because it melted either. hehe! I am so glad that we have more time to get everything together, too. Ravyn and I are making her bouquet... I have a picture of her holding her partial bouquet but I think I'll wait until it's completed before I post a picture of it.

Brandon: Poor Brandon has to have oral surgery on July 30th. He has an adult tooth up on the palette of his mouth which has to be surgically uncovered. They will attach a small chain to it and then to his braces and it will slowly pull that tooth down. When it's time, the baby tooth which is in it's place, will be pulled and the adult tooth can come down where it should have gone in the first place. This is the eye tooth and the oral surgeon explained to us how important the eye teeth are. According to the x-ray, his wisdom teeth are ready to be pulled too so we are going to do all that at the same time. It makes sense to sedate him only once and have him recover from surgery only once. I feel bad for him since I know how hard the wisdom teeth extraction is. I had it done one summer while I was in HS and my family went on a trip 2 days afterwards. I had the choice of either going with them or staying for a week with my aunt and uncle. I decided that I might as well go on the trip so I did. It wasn't the most enjoyable trip I've ever been on but I survived! Brandon will survive too. He also has a birthday coming up on July 28th! He will be 15 yrs old. We are having his party on the 25th. He is going to get the Mario Kart for the Wii. Yes, we broke down and let Jessica buy the Wii last month with her government money. Karl and I swore we'd never buy it and at least WE didn't. haha... j/k of course. Since Jess doesn't feel well enough to go out much we figured she should be able to use her money to buy something to help entertain herself. If the kids fight over who gets to play it then nobody does. We've found which games are too strenuous for her to play and which ones are OK for her. She gets so "blue" so easily, we have to watch her or she will be trying to catch her breath and looking like a purple grape. Poor kid.

Austin: Austin is doing well. He is involved in scouts and does his calling really well at church. There's not a whole lot going on with Austin except that he told me that he needs some "Mom and Austin" time. I have been very preoccupied with so many things that I guess I haven't spent enough time with him. He wants me to watch a movie with him so we will definitely have to do it! He and I really need to start a walking program. We are both feeling the effects of not getting enough exercise and being around food all day (all night for me).

Karl: Karl has been working his cute pattootie off hard. He's taken some off-duty jobs, had his schedule changed around and around, and helping out an officer who was involved in a near-fatal accident. Actually, I have spent some time with the officer's wife too. Officer Bobby suffered severe head injuries and wasn't expected to survive. It's been 3 1/2 weeks and he is recovering from his other injuries but his brain has a lot of healing left to do. He recognizes his wife and can walk but he is still very confused and emotional. Please pray for him and his wife, Kristi, that they will get through this. They have two small children who are staying with grandparents (who live out of state) right now. This is an amazing couple and we really hope that Officer Bobby will make a full recovery.

Karl has also been working on my craft room & laundry room and it is now time to do the texture on the walls and ceilings. One of our friends has a texture machine and is supposed to come on Saturday to make a huge mess texture the place. I'm so stressed excited! At least after the texture is done, dry and cleaned up... all we have to do is paint and put in the flooring - - - then I can MOVE IN!!! Do I dare hope?

Nancy: is in great need of a gardener... or more likely a crew of people to rip out tons of weeds that have been growing since the monsoon season started. I'm also in need of a maid... or someone with a back-hoe to clean out my mess of a house! The monsoons have brought the much needed storms to our area but of course my fibromyalgia doesn't like storms so I've been dealing with pain. Lots of it. I also have no time to myself except for the times I stay up after Jess goes to bed. Some times it's not until the wee hours of the morning. I'm not kidding. Look at the time stamp on this post. I started this post at around 3:15am and it's now 3:57 am. But I digress.

My sister, Alice, had a baby boy last week! Joseph Hyrum Vivaldo. We got to go and visit them and pass the baby around. He was 3 days old and soooooo cute! Poor Alice looked tired so we didn't stay terribly long. (we also respected her enough to not take pictures of her at this time) Our crew - of 6 7 (sorry Ravyn, I almost forgot to count you!) can take a toll and anyone! Jessica was so proud of herself for being able to hold such a tiny baby. Justen and Ravyn got to hold him too. I think Ravyn was a little surprised that Justen knew how to hold a baby so small but I reminded her that he held his younger brothers when they were babies and he has also held other baby cousins.

Here is Jessica... so proud to be able to hold her new cousin!

Jessica and Hyrum

Ravyn taking her turn holding Hyrum while Justen waits his turn.

Jessica playing with her other cousins, Jesse, Julie and Marissa - who are all so proud of their baby brother. (Jess had an extremely late night that night and has not been up to par since. Going out really wears her down and she has to have recovery time.) But she had a great time that night and it was all worth it!

And last but not least....

MY BABY!

She's a 2005 Nissan Altima. Karl has been stressing out so much over the price of gas and the fact that our SUV only gets 10 mpg! This car gets 22 - 31 mpg, can fit all 5 of us and the oxygen goes in the trunk. Karl is so smart... he figured out that the oxygen tubing can come through a crack in the seats from the trunk... the seats can fold down and make the already huge trunk bigger so that is an awesome way for Jess to have her O2 and it not be in the way. We still have the SUV for the times that she needs her motorized wheelchair - which would include trips to the doctor, the mall, or any other long-distance walking is required. She doesn't need it to go to some one's home so here we were (in the picture) getting ready to go to grandma & grandpa Jensen's house on the 4th of July. (pictures of that fun event to come later too!) Karl has been so much more relaxed at the price of gas now that we have a much more economical car. We were able to put 1/3 of the price down so our payments are very reasonable. It's a beautiful car - inside and out. Only 30,000 miles on it and still under warranty. Sorry guys... it's ALL MINE! (Well, I let Karl drive it from time to time though... hehe!)

So anyway... these are the major updates that I can think of... and now that it's nearly 5:00am and it's starting to get light outside, it's time for me to go to bed. No, I'm not a slow typist... I just got to playing with the SD card that can fit nicely into my laptop (which I am using right now) and I downloaded 3 month's worth of photos. Now I need to transport them to my portable (pretty) hard drive. :) *I'm soooo spoiled!!!!*

Update on Miss Jess

It seems that the Procainamide is helping! wOOt! Jessica still has periods of time where she says her heart is beating fast or hard but they don't last long - and they don't seem to be happening as often. We saw the Peds Cardiologist last Thursday and he said that she looked good! We did an EKG and it is the same as prior to the meds (they did an EKG several times while she was in the hospital). So everything looks pretty good! The doctor asked me if I wanted him to order a holter monitor and I said yes. He asked me why since Jess seems to be feeling better and do I REALLY want to know he was going to order a holter monitor. Yes, I REALLY want to know exactly how many PVCs Jess is actually having. I'm still waiting for the hospital to call me to set it up. I haven't called them since it's been a hugely hectic week and I'm not extremely worried about it. Jessica told me last night that her heart was beating "crazy" so I put the pulse ox on her. She was having some PVCs but they weren't in a pattern - just random. After a few minutes she went into a pretty steady rhythm and she was able to settle down and go to sleep. She doesn't have nearly as many PVCs when she is sleeping so I told her that what she needs to do is to go to sleep and then they will stop. I'm not sure if that will work but maybe it will give her some motivation to relax and that it's OK to go to sleep. She has been afraid to go to sleep for fear that she won't wake up.

This last Monday we had our first Tu Nidito group meeting of the year (they go by school year). It was so nice to be back. Jessica LOVES going to Tu Nidito and even though it's quite a drive for us and Jess gets tired easily, she did really well! She just about knocked me over when at the beginning of the group they had us all join together and asked if there were any announcements - Jess raised her hand and said, "I am out of the hospital because they found a medicine to CURE my heart!" Several people started clapping and many parents who know us were looking at me with very puzzled looks on their faces. I stepped in and said, "I need to qualify that - they found a medicine to help get rid of most of the extra heart-beats". Jessica knows that. In fact, on the way there she asked me if she could announce that she was home and has a medicine to get rid of the PVCs. It was just a slip of the tongue since she was nervous. After everyone separated to their classrooms and us adults were alone, I broke down and cried, telling the other parents that Jessica's heart disease is progressing and even though we have a medication to help with the PVCs, she is dying. The medication won't prevent tachycardia or a sudden heart attack. I told them that we found all this out right before my birthday. Three years ago right before my birthday Jess was admitted into a home hospice program because she was having lung bleeds practically daily. Now she is having 10,000 PVCs daily. I wonder what she is going to do in 3 years from now for my birthday? I started laughing through my tears. Knowing her, she will still be here trying to find new ways to scare me. LOL! Later, one of the other moms said that I was her hero and that she didn't know how I do it... that I've been caring for a child with a lot of health problems for 19 years. She's only been doing it for 4. I told her that in 19 years from now she will still be doing it for her daughter because she is her daughter. That's how I do it. She's my daughter - so I do whatever I have to do. Another mom chimed in that we (meaning me and Karl) have a great sense of humor and that helps. I laughed and said that we have a SICK sense of humor. Jessica has been using her hand to show me how her heart feels. She will make a fist and then open it wide and close it, open wide and close it. I tease her and say, Jessica, it's when your heart does this (I hold my closed fist up) that we need to worry. She says, "Oh MOoooooom!" and laughs.

Today is a very special day for Miss Jess. The Disney Princess on Ice is in town and our local support group, Tu Nidito, has arranged for the girls to have dinner at a Mansion downtown and then have a limo ride to the show! They are providing 4 tickets to each girl. Jessica is sooooo excited to go! Austin wants to go to spend time with Jessica and of course Karl and I want to go too! Brandon and Justen don't really mind missing it so they will stay at home and hang out together... hopefully not harming each other or the house. LOL!

Last week Austin took a spill off his scooter and broke his fall with his face and knee! He broke a tooth and was pretty banged up. That was on Monday. Tuesday I took him to the dentist and they did an x-ray, etc. The dentist showed me where the nerve was exposed. Anyway, he needed a root canal. :*( The dentist was able to do about 80% of the root canal but had to stop because there was too much bleeding in the area. So we went back on Thursday to finish it up.... the girls at the office had forgotten to call me and reschedule so we made the trip for nothing! At least they are only a few miles away. We went back on Monday and they were able to finish the root canal and reconstruct the tooth BUT... of course there's always a BUT... the tooth is loose and he may lose it. He is instructed to not bite with that tooth and to just leave it alone. We are to see him in 2 weeks and see how the tooth is doing at that time. Of course we had to pay for the root canal and tooth reconstruction at the time of service. I told the dentist that I had a dream that we paid him $800 for him to fix the tooth and then he ended up pulling it just 2 days later! He said, "that's not a dream... that's a nightmare!" Fortunately we have good insurance and out of $1,000+ we only had to pay $250. Of course that's not pocket change for us but we were able to do it. Austin has been such a trooper through this whole ordeal. He was quite traumatised at first but was able to settle down. The first visit to the dentist he asked for the "gas" and he was quite comfortable with it. The second visit was supposed to be very easy and since the nerve was already dead, they didn't give him anything. The dentist told him that if he felt any pain to stop him and he would give him something. Well, apparently Austin didn't understand the last part and when they were done he came out pretty shaken up. It broke my heart! But like a real trooper he got over it pretty quickly and was able to go home and enjoy the rest of the evening. Austin has healed up quite well but here's a couple of pictures the day of his accident... in fact, his knee and face looked worse the day after!




It's amazing how God works... He watches over us and blesses us in ways we don't even realize. Karl and I have been faithfully paying our tithing, having faith that we will be blessed. Last Friday I had a Creative Memories event and had quite a few ladies come. It was pretty hectic to start with - we were short quite a few tables but with Karl's and Justen's help we were able to locate and set up enough tables. My customers had a great time and kept me busy the whole night. I had a couple of new customers who really enjoyed themselves and want to come to more events. After all was said and done, I had a lot of sales... all of which was product that I had in stock! I earned enough to be able to pay for the work done on Austin's tooth and still have enough to place an order to replace some of the product that I like to keep in stock. Of course I'll be paying tithing on the profits. (For those who would like to know, I earn 30% on the product I sell.... and of course that's 30% discount on whatever I purchase for myself.) I have a CM home event this Saturday with a very sweet lady. SHE contacted me and asked to do one in her home. I haven't done a home show in at least a year! So I'm kind of nervous... but one of my other really great customers will be there too so I feel more at ease. I keep telling myself that I don't need to be nervous... just go and enjoy myself. I love what I do and I love the products... I do this for FUN, not for the sales so if I make some money GREAT! If not, then at least I got out of the house and had some fun with adult women! hehe!

Last night my mom called and I was telling her that my stomach hasn't been feeling very well lately and that I've been having more anxiety. Then I told her about all the appointments that I've had with Jess and Austin and how exhausted I was before even going to my CM event and that I needed all weekend to recover. All the things I've gone through with Jess and Austin are very emotionally draining and then of course all the running around is tiring. My mom said that it made her tired just hearing about all that I've been through the last couple of weeks. I realized , well, DUH....... no wonder my stomach isn't feeling well and I've had more anxiety. LOL! I need to give myself a break and pray for a boring week next week. haha!

Music

After a hiatus from doing the weekly Photo Hunters, I am back! My computer's hard drive crashed and I lost some information. We bought a new hard drive and I had to find my photos (which I had backed-up. yay!) and reinstall my favorite photo organizing program (Creative Memories - Memory Manager) and then realized that all the sorting was gone because I hadn't backed it up right. ugh! Then... my daughter started having problems with arrhythmias, etc... but I've decided that I need to do the photo hunters meme because I LOVE IT! So without further adieu, here's my music photos:


Austin and Brandon really liked Grandpa's musical dancing Santa


Austin in orchestra last year (5th grade)


Here is my nephew, Marcus, with his marching band. Marcus plays the baritone. He loves the marching band and what is so amazing is that he is doing it even while battling a cancerous brain tumor. Way to go, Marcus!


Jessica and her date, Phil, went to a special prom for teens who are dealing with serious medical problems. Jessica is in the tiara and cream blouse sitting at the table. Phil is sitting to her left and we know other the girls at the table from our Tu Nidito support group.


Some of the teens dancing at the prom.

Jessica didn't like the music to be so loud so she and Phil went into the room where photos were being taken to talk and enjoy the prom.

Just in case it isn't obvious to everyone... there is music at the prom... hence the prom pictures. hehe

My Two Graduates

Here are my two graduates. Austin promoted (graduated) from 5th grade this morning. Here in AZ the students usually promote from 5th grade into middle school. Austin attended his class's promotion even though he is going to stay at his elementary school for 6th grade. Our elementary school has been offering 6th grade for only 2 years now. Brandon went to middle school for 6th grade. And speaking of Brandon, he promoted from middle school today and will be attending high school in August! I am so proud of my two sons who have done well in school this last year. Tonight Karl was telling me that two people from church were telling him what great kids these two boys are. One of the men that Karl was talking to is Austin's Sunday School teacher. He told Karl that Austin is very knowledgeable about the gospel and loves to participate in class. The other person Karl was visiting with is one of Brandon's leaders at church. He was telling Karl how much he enjoys having Brandon in his class and what a great sense of humor he has. One time the Deacons (12 & 13 yr old boys) were playing football as an activity and they wanted Brandon to do a button-hook. Brandon didn' know what that was so they had another one of the boys run out onto the field and show him. As this other young man started to turn he slipped and fell. Everyone started laughing (even the young man who fell). Then Brandon asks, "So what am I supposed to do after I fall?" More laughter! What a character!

Wish me luck now that school is out. I hope these boys don't kill each other or die of boredom. lol! They have to share a room - which is so messy I may have to get a back-hoe to clean it out. That's one of our big projects for the summer. To get rid of a lot of junk and get their room more organized.

Cooking

Austin is cooking dinner for the other scouts and their leaders.

Dad and Austin enjoying the meal.

A Mom's gotta brag....

My son, Austin, took a test in January for the GATE (gifted and talented educational program) and we got the letter today saying that he qualifies! I talked to him about being involved in it and he said he wants to! He won't start until the fall (August) but he's quite proud of himself. I can't believe he will be in 6th grade already! Fortunately our elementary school now offers 6th grade and he will be staying there one more year.

This picture is of Austin and our cat, Charlie.

A conversation I heard as the family was gathering together for dinner:

Austin says to Brandon: "Your mom is so cool!"

Brandon replies back to Austin: "So is your mom!"

What more could a mom ask for? (Just for the record, I wasn't even in the room AND they didn't even want anything from me. So how cool is that?)

A Valentine My Son, Austin, drew for me.

Isn't he sweet? hehehe! He is 11 years old. I will be giggling about it for days!